Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Birth! YEA!!!!!!!!!!

We have a girl!! A tie maker. Tavia Elizabeth Carlile.

We are now a 3 boy, 3 girl family.



Tavia weighs 5# 8oz and measures 18".
She was born at 5:25 am AST at home in Trafalgar, Dominica, WI.
Our first homebirth, 2nd VBA2C. Woohoo! It is done!

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Regression Agression!

1/26/10
7:20pm
It is funny how easy it is to lose ground if you do not have Pitocin pushing you to dilate. Every time I lie down, I regress. Every time I am up, I progress, but the contractions are so very hard now, that I am so exhausted. Add to that my sleep cycle being upside down, and you get a crazy day!
Bonnie and Marie, 2 of Travis' schoolmates, stopped by today with pizza, cookies, and chocolate. I really enjoyed visiting with them. Hopefully I am able to see them again soon with a baby in arms.

I just had a very hard contraction- the back labor is still there. I don't know what is in the magic of calling out, "Oh, Mommy." that helps me. It seems to help me relax to point that I can bear the rest of the contraction without crying or screaming. Wish this baby would turn completely. I found out that Oil of Ojas, a local oil here, is lovely for soothing my back labor. The clove oil in it numbs wherever I rub it. Too bad I cannot use it internally!!
Update later...

Monday, January 25, 2010

Finally, labor? Yep!

1/26/10
12:?? a.m.
Here I am, very little water pressure, no hot water, with very hard contractions every 2 minutes. Very frustrating! This will be the last time I fill the pool. I am using the cold, low pressure line to get water in and the electric hot water kettle to heat the pool. It is frustrating, but necessary. The contractions are so hard that all I can do is breathe through them. Much different than the past months, much different from the past weeks.

I used some water from the barrel. Hope it will not cause infection! I carried several buckets and water pitchers full of room-temp water from one bathroom to the other, through the kitchen, stopping every 2 minutes to stand and lean and breathe.
Soon I will be able to get in. It won't be as deep as I like, nor as warm, but it will provide some relief- all I can hope for.
Even as I think and type these words, I stop every so often to lean, breathe, and try to keep from screaming! I need that bath. Well, back to the hot water kettle...

6:13am
The past few hours have been very productive! I took a bath which felt like hours, but in reality was maybe 45 minutes. I slept between contractions which were about 3 minutes apart. I decided to get out since I did not want to drown. I then laid down beside my husband and passed out for the few minutes between each contraction- not very long I tell you. I woke a bit before 6am and used the restroom. I noticed some extra in the receptacle. I then checked dilation and was VERY surprised to find myself fully effaced and dilated to about 7cm! For the past weeks I have puttered so slooooowly, that to find myself gone from 4cm-ish to 7cm and fully effaced while "sleeping" took me by surprise.
I will update later, preferably after baby is born...

11:46am
Baby is not born yet. I took a much needed nap and I don't remember anything except a few hard contractions that woke me throughout. I woke after about 1.5 hours of restless sleep feeling a bit refreshed. Let's get this moving again. I think the water broke before I laid down for my nap, not sure, but anyway we are within hours of birth...

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Another week...

Another night of labor. It seems that the word putter is now my own. I am what is known as a putterer- in more than just labor. There are times when I work fast and hard, but most of the time, I putter. Have you ever had those moments where you just wish the person in front of you would just get out of the way and quit being so poky? Well, I am probably in front, puttering. I am sure a "Please be patient" sign would do wonders. So, I have written on my proverbial forehead "Give me time. Please be patient."
I was thinking of patience and how little I seem to have. Jesus had such patience especially for the little children. I try to think of that in everyday dealings, but my stinking human nature constantly rears its ugly head. I found myself being quite irritable today. It could be the hard contractions that make me want to vomit. It could also be the noise that only bothers me during a contraction. It could be the movements that, again, only bug me during a contraction.
I am just so ready to be done that I forget to be patient. This little babe, with God's unending help, knows when it is time. I really don't have to do anything, but I constantly find myself irritable at the wait, ready for the change.
Am I really prepared for the change from belly-hugger to baby-holder? No. It is as simple as that. I can try to prepare, but in reality, I cannot plan for everything. I am glad that I am not the one holding the reins. I would fail miserably at keeping the million tiny things in line. I am no god. Each day I need reminders that I cannot be in control. Think if, in our human weakness, God gave us the responsibility of forming a baby in the womb. Would we succeed to make a perfect human as He does? Would we be able to remember each exquisite detail of the human brain and body?
While Travis was studying embryology, he shared with me a little of what goes on during the process of formation at each stage- and that is only the human understanding. It is a huge amount of knowledge that doctors today know about how babies are formed. A tiny heart is functioning and pumping at 5 weeks, when the baby is still the size of a sesame seed! I know I could not create such wonders.

Give me patience and peace...

Sunday, January 17, 2010

What? Still pregnant!?

Yes, yes, I know... still pregnant. Well, it does take 9 1/2 months for a typical human gestation. I am just glad I am not an elephant; they gestate for 22 months and give birth to a 250 pound baby!! I will be glad to wait until this 9 1/2 months is finished.

The past few days have been tiring, but not as tiring as a pregnant elephant I am sure. I have had harder contractions with more regularity. All last night I was woken by my own moaning with each contraction. I was able to take a bath which felt sooooo good. Thank you Benny for the use of your pool. Each day brings a new tiredness, preparing me for the awesome task of caring for a newborn: feeding, dressing, diapering, soothing, holding, gazing at... the list goes on. Soon, very soon.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

The days drag on...

The past few days have been a bit muddled. Just waiting and waiting... and waiting. This babe has to be born sometime, right??

I feel like I am in one of those supermarket doors that revolve. First I can accept that the time is near but not right now, then I am impatient, then resigned, then accepting, and so forth. I know part of it is hormones, but I feel like all my joy for this baby is gone.

I have been staying low to make sure the health nurse does not come and "talk" to me about birthing at home. I was told that she is responsible if anything happens to me while giving birth at home! I think it is just something she takes on herself. I surely would not press charges on her since I don't care for her assistance. She says that she is the midwife, but if she is anything like the other midwife in Loubiere, forget it, I will have my baby completely alone or just with my husband.
I am of the thought that birth, like conception, is a private, quiet time between two intimate persons-- not between me, and some nurse or doctor. Again I am on a soapbox, but when does "assistance" end? Why would I have to take her assistance? I did check into the "laws" surrounding birth and there are none that state a woman cannot have her baby at home, in any circumstances. It is a decision that parents make. Of course we would not make it lightly since it is a decision that affects more than just Travis and I. It affects a new life and 5 other children.

Ok, stepping down now. I will leave that argument for all the UC'ers out there. I just wish to be left alone.

For the past couple of days the contractions have been harder and more rhythmic, but go away when I am exhausted and lie down! How frustrating. I would rather keep going and them make me arise from bed and have a baby! But, patience, Sasha, patience, your time will come and you will curse the labor to which you look forward!

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

A pregnancy funny

Tonight, I was getting ready to smooth some oil on my belly and had my shirt up around the top of my belly. Trinton walks in and says, "You have a big belly button. Your stomach looks like bread." Just what you want to hear, right? So then we had a discussion about bread and my belly. Travis quipped with, "I thought that too, but did not want to say anything."
Good thing I can laugh!
So the conclusion is that I have bread dough belly, like a Russian perogi- a surprise inside. I guess my belly jiggles a bit like bread dough and is raised and soft, and the COLOR of bread dough!!!!
I don't know whether to laugh or cry about my belly being described as such!

Walking for a baby.

Today we walked to the river to help bring the baby down and out. (If you want to see river pics, go here.) Ha! The only time we want someone to be down and out. This morning we listened to the baby's heartbeat. Little race horse in there. I don't know what week or how far along this pregnancy is now. We have some confusion as to what date was really the LMP and which date to count and how many weeks to count from there- 39 or 40 weeks. With a 3-week cycle, you usually count 39 weeks from LMP, but even then, what if?... I am certain that this baby will come when it needs and that it will not stay in forever! I know that God's wisdom is far greater than mine. Maybe this baby needs extra growing time.
I am glad that a due date is when the baby is born, not a certain date that this baby has to be born by, or risk a c-section. I am happy with my decision to have a natural birth, a homebirth. I have suffered the trauma of 4 hospital births with 2 c-sections and a VBAC. This will be our first HBAC.
Today is Travis' dad's birthday. He was hoping to have a baby on this day, but so far, no dice. We will see what will happen before midnight, but I am NOT holding my breath. Travis also stated that this baby (if a boy) should be named ______ Clifford, but Trinton has that name.
Are there any good Carlile/Dirks/Derenoff/Cole family names that we might use for middle names? These would include Moy, Devine, Hansen, Lapedias, and Holub names too. Any others?
Here is an update of what I have made to add to the other day's post:

This yellow sleeper is made from one of my t-shirts that was getting worn and I felt it was time to recycle. The pants are also recycled with fresh sewn panty area. The pair on the left comes from a pair of pjs that ended up moldy after a sack of clothing sat and retained moisture. The purple/blue pair's legs are from Taleah's long-sleeved shirt that wasn't long enough in the arms for her. It still fits her in the length, so no need to pass it onto Taya, just make it short-sleeved!

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Today's work

Again I am having contractions and again they will peter out.

Update: They petered out.

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Nope, no baby yet...

I guess that must be my opening line since I am getting tired of answering "Do we have a baby yet?" with "No, of course not."

Today I have been having contractions every 2-3 minutes with varying degrees of severity. Some I cannot handle, most are easily handled. I have never had a very consistent pattern of contractions with them getting stronger, closer together, and making "headway" in the canal. I have, however, managed to dilate to 5cm and back down to 3cm, efface to about 60%, and get the baby down into position. Before, the contractions could not work properly because baby's little head was turned wrong and not engaged all the way. I would have hated to have back labor like I did with Trinton.

Trajun's birth was a long, drawn out one, much like this. I labored for about a week with on-and-off contractions before they set into a hard and fast pattern after taking a whole bottle of castor oil. I may never drink a chocolate shake from Jack in the Box again! I gag just thinking of it. After hard labor set in with Trajun, he was born a little over 3 hours later. It felt like 20 minutes.



Just another boring day waiting around...

I don't know if this has anything to do with it, but the full moon is past and tonight's moon is only 82% illuminated and has a zenith here at 3:24am.
I am just trying to enjoy my time handsewing a few extra baby items. So far, added to the items of a few days ago, I have made 2 more pairs of pants and almost have one sleeper done. I will show pics as soon as I am done with the sleeper.

Friday, January 1, 2010

Happy New Year.

Well, this pregnancy will finish in this new year. A 2010 baby- I can handle that. I think I had a mental block on when the baby was supposed to be born! People kept saying, "Better hurry up and have this baby so you get another tax break." And for some stupid reason, my mind was convinced that I failed if I did not achieve that! As soon as I realized that the new year had come and there would be no extra entry on our 2009 taxes, I relaxed. Funny how things work. And then I was plagued by hard contractions all throughout my sleep.
Also, last night while thinking about my part in this, I came to the realization (again) that I am just a vessel for this baby. I cannot evict or otherwise control the length of stay. Well, I could, but if the baby is not ready, would that be very nice- or could it be considered a type of abortion? That caught me up short.
I am ready for this baby to be born- I think. I know I could be much more prepared with clothing, diapers, etc., but mentally, I think I am just ready for the baby to come.

I looked at what I have for baby in the way of material goods.

A girl and boy sweater/hat/booties set, a few pairs of recycled pants. I made these by taking the arms off long sleeves shirts from the older children and sewing them onto little panty-type sewn fabric.


A few accessories, 6 onesies, 2 "soakers" 7 homemade prefold diapers, and 5 plastic pants- just in case.
This might do for the first week. I plan on making a few sleepers, plenty more diapers, pants, and shirts. I think I might have to go buy socks for the baby since it is the cold part of the year here. (I know, nothing compared to the weather most of you are going through!) I have been chilly several evenings and a few days to the point where I wear pants, sweat jacket, and socks in bed! Even pregnant!

I decided on a few "New Year's resolutions" that I can actually attain:

1. Lose 20 pounds! Ha, this year I won't have a very hard time with that.
2. Spend more time with my children; I have them for so short a time.
3. Don't take anything for granted; it can always be taken away.
4. Say "I love you" to my husband and each of my children at least once a day.